Why it’s never OK to question someone’s sexuality, as Ricky Martin reveals he has “a little PTSD” following an interview.
Few issues are more personal than a person’s sexuality, and being questioned on your orientation before you’re ready to talk about it can be painful if you don’t identify as cisgender.
Individuals, on the other hand, are frequently subjected to improper questions and comments about their sex lives, often with a level of judgmental curiosity that heteronormative people do not encounter.
The mental toll of ‘coming out’ pressure in the LGBTQ community is a very real thing, whether well-intentioned or not, and it’s something that music artist Ricky Martin has recently come out about.
When he was famously encouraged to come out during a television appearance with Barbara Walters on The View in 2000, the 49-year-old says he felt “violated.”
“I felt violated when she dropped the question because I wasn’t ready to come out yet. I was terrified. Martin told People Magazine, “There’s a little PTSD with that.”
Stonewall’s advise to adults regarding coming out is that people should take their time before deciding to tell others about their sexual orientation or gender identity, because “only you will know when you feel comfortable and ready to do it,” they wrote.
Amy Ashenden, head of communications at Just Like Us, the LGBT+ young people’s organisation, adds, “It’s so vital that people are allowed room to discover out who they are.” “This is especially true for young individuals who may be discovering they are LGBT+ while living with unaccepting families or hearing derogatory language at school.”
While the Equality Act of 2010 prohibits discrimination and harassment on the basis of sexual orientation and gender reassignment (gender identity) at work, there is little protection against hostile reactions from friends or family, which is why many members of the community take time and courage to reach a point of self-empowerment.
“People’s gender and sexuality are internalized and intrinsically personal things, and it’s inappropriate to quiz or question them about it because they may not be aware of it yet. (This is a brief piece.)